| Familiar phrase | Probably means | |
| Design and construction | ||
| Excellent compromise cruiser/racer | Too slow to win, too spartan to enjoy | |
| Fine racing record | Everything over-stressed or broken | |
| Built on traditional lines | Narrow, gloomy, with numerous untraceable leaks | |
| Sturdy and popular boat | She’s no looker | |
| Comfortable craft | Sluggish | |
| Great appeal for serious wanderer considering live aboard situation | Has all the airy grace of a block of council flats | |
| Rare version of legendary design | Modified by home handyman, super-structure resembling garden shed | |
| Ideal first time purchase | Basic bath-tub | |
| Single handed beach launched & recovered | Have hernia, must sell | |
| A real head turner | Always at the back of the racing fleet | |
| For the discerning owner | Only masochistic oddballs need apply | |
| A true collector’s piece | Belongs in a museum | |
| Fittings and equipment | ||
| All modern navigational gear, fridge/freezer/all electric water supply | If the power fails, you’re on your own | |
| Running H&C water, showers etc | Heavy condensation problems | |
| Compact/efficient/well planned galley | Meagre work surfaces, minimal stowage and sited to allow buttock- to-buttock contact with navigator at chart table | |
| Convenient navigation area | See ‘galley’ reference buttock Interlocking | |
| Cabin heating | Light all gas rings and open oven door | Sleeps 6/8 | Has comfortable berths for four, the rest hang from the rafters or kip on a rota basis |
| Extensive sail wardrobe, sime never used | Most tattered and threadbare, storm jib still in original bag, with all the hanks seized | |
| Usual inventory | Has barest essentials | |
| Many extras | Will throw in dubious dinghy, some well-thumbed charts, and hand-bearing compass with obscuring bubble | Inventory too comprehensive to list | Owner can’t face thought of clearing clutter of years |
| Home comforts | ||
| Cleverly designed interior | Everything converts into something else, causing complete chaos in process | |
| Cunningly concealed stowage space | Locker doors guaranteed to mangle fingers without allowing access to contents | |
| Generous stowage | Has numerous deep caverns in which precious items disappear without trace | |
| Deceptively spacious | Looks roomy, but isn’t | |
| Light, airy saloon | No privacy, start sewing curtains | |
| All the charm of an old-timer | None of the basic necessities of modern living | |
| Amateur interior | Bungled interior | |
| Elegant and luxurious accommodation | Pretentious gin-palace | |
| Recently completely refurbished | Paint dribbles everywhere | |
| All new upholstery | In colour you’ll loathe on sight | |
| Needs some cosmetics | Has finish of primitive dug-out | |
| Present condition | ||
| Very clean | Owner has done heroic deodorizing job | |
| One fastidious owner from new | Has had difficulty selling | |
| Maintained regardless expense | Owner still white-faced from recent yard bill | |
| Strong as the day she was built | Remember the Titanic? | |
| Interesting history | Salvage job | |
| Most of the hard work done | The expensive work remains | |
| Ready to win | Hasn’t won yet | |
| Sound in all major areas | She floats | |
| Needs some attention | Needs major refit | |
| Needs major refit | She doesn’t float | |
| Getting down to the nitty gritty | ||
| Save thousands | Spend thousands | |
| Very seriously for sale | The price is no laughing matter | |
| Price on application | If you have to ask, you can’t afford it | |
| No offers | Owner over confident. Let him stew for a while | |
| Offers over £x | Owner getting worried | |
| Realistically priced | Owner reluctantly acknowledging grim truth | |
| Now much reduced price | Owner desperate | |
| Price fully negotiable | Anything vaguely legal considered | |
| The reasons why | ||
| Owner buying larger | Owner bragging | |
| Emigration forces sale | No comeback if keel drops off in a week | |
| Redundancy forces sale | Owner prematurely committed to new boat. This one now superfluous to requirements | |
| Business forces sale | employer, suspicious of frequent sick leave on sunny afternoons during sailing season, forces sale | |
| Illness forces sale | Boat rolls like a pig. Seasick family forces sale | |
| Genuine reason for sale | Bank manager forces sale | |
| Very reluctantly for sale | Wife forces sale | |
| Partnership split forces sale | Divorce pending | |
| Oddities and absurdities | ||
| A rare opportunity to purchase | All sister ships succumbed to age years ago | |
| Unique craft | Weird one-off | |
| Well known locally | Has taken gouges out of every boat in the marina | |
| Well-mannered boat | Always lets others lead the way | |
| real sea-going boat | Do not attempt to sail this 35-footer in the village pond | |
| Must be seen, inspection recommended | Who but the clinically deranged would buy a boat without seeing it first? | |
| Truly one for the yachting connoisseur | Blatant flattery. If you fall for this one you’re beyond any I can offer |